I had a huge problem which was having a really big impact on not only how I felt, but my relationship with a manager.

In my mind I was constantly being asked to repeat work that I had already done effectively and in turn I felt like it was wasting precious time, I was angry and frustrated and to be honest I was losing respect for them as a manager. 

I approached Carolyn, initially to vent but as it turned out Carolyn coached me.

Her style and approach was non-judgemental, she was empathetic and guided me to find a resolution. I felt at ease as Carolyn went through a process of asking me questions in terms of how I thought I needed to respond, or what action I thought I needed to take. It wasn’t Carolyn telling me, it was me finding the answers myself by being coached and asked a series of questions. 

So for example she asked me what was I missing and what did I need to understand. Instead of being angry and really frustrated I realised I didn’t actually understand why she wanted the information presented again, it wasn’t explained to me and being the person I am I need to understand the reason for any actions. The coaching reminded me that their learning style was completely different to mine and so we needed to find a common ground and agree what was relevant. 

I realised I needed a conversation with my line manager, which I did when I was feeling calm. We found a resolution.

This has had a massive impact in the sense that now instead of getting annoyed  and frustrated I will go back and get clarity so I understand the reason why and in a sense debate it, we are all so busy and sometimes decisions are made in haste without actually thinking of the impact. The difference now is I don’t have all those negative feelings I had before, I simply tell myself I need to go and have a second conversation.